Turn Regret into GROWTH!

Regrets! we all have them. Things you didn’t do & things you didn’t say or things you DID do & things you DID say! Regret follows like a heavy dark cloud pregnant with tears & sad whisperings of “If only I didn’t…” or frustrating groans of “Why did I say that!” 21766424_10214980807538723_2244006853059587424_n

So, what’s to be done with that nagging voice full of lament, moaning as it drags its heavy sighs along the chambers of your heart, uncomfortably always ‘there’ never letting you forget?beautiful-lavender-field-free-photo-2210x1473.jpg

Learn from it. Turn your regret into GROWTH. We all have done stupid things & have said things that can’t be taken back. All of us. It isn’t the best way to learn but it is a way nonetheless, life has its lessons &, moving on from past mistakes however burdensome the backwash, is sometimes the only way ‘some of us’ (I think most of us) LEARN.  photo-1530130134620-e60c68df0bee

In essence, LEARN from it, GROW from it, FORGIVE YOURSELF, & finally! MOVE ON X

“She threw away all her masks, & put on her soul.”

Confidence doesn’t come from what you wear. It’s true, a nice glam outfit helps, but eventually, that outfit has to come off & you are left with YOU. Be happy about that! I have stood naked in front of my mirror & faced myself, I wanted to wish those extra pounds away, I wanted to take ten years off my face, & what I had to acknowledge & do acknowledge is that I am who I am, warts & all, I am me. I am not perfect. That’s the key, fall in love with being YOU. There is no one on this planet like you. You are special. You are worth it! Don’t wait for others to give you that pat on the back or that praise from their lips, it all starts with how you talk to you. Adorn your inner self with the beauty of kind, gentle & supportive words. Clothes can’t do that.

I was talking to a woman the other day who has breast cancer. She is facing herself. I looked at this woman & thought…wow! This woman is truly beautiful. We sat & had a cup of tea together & as she spoke, I listened to her soul. There was such a mixture of fear, courage, tears & beauty, too. Her naked soul was openly exposed to me & she was frightened like a scared child. Everything she exchanged to me was real. Have we forgotten to be real?  Have we forgotten to have meaningful exchanges with people? To touch & comfort their suffering rather than just admire their outer garments! A truly genuine person revealing real feelings is very rare to find in a world that constantly bombards us with “Gotta be more, do more…you are not enough unless…” Bah! Don’t buy into it or you’ll never escape the knife of the plastic surgeon! YOU ARE ENOUGH! I think that is where it all begins, with YOU, not accepting the ugly, useless labels that society tries to slap on you. If you are 60 plus, great! Wisdom speaks from the lips of those who have walked this earth a little longer & what a fine adornment is that pearl of prudence, insight & respect, there is no outfit that can ever compete with such valuable qualities of the heart.

Personally, fashion does not dictate to me what I must wear year in & year out. I wear clothes that I like, I don’t follow the crowd & I prefer the truly timeless classics, a style that doesn’t date.

Just be your lovely self & KNOW you are lovely BEFORE you dress up glam! & when that outfit comes off, you will be left with you, someone uniquely special, someone who is real, who can be frightened, scared & courageous all at the same time. Collect real people, fake ones are a dime a dozen! In this life, when very scary things happen, you don’t need a glamour queen sitting across from you at the table, you do need someone who has got their real on way before they’ve ever got their fashion style on. Make up your inner wardrobe first, it is way more important than your clothes closet.  You can’t buy confidence, it can’t be found in a clothes store. Confidence is found within you, as you enjoy & appreciate the truly unique & beautiful person that you are.girl-2178157_960_720

French Women don’t Compare, They Admire. -Renata Huster-

I like that about French women. I like it a lot. It doesn’t matter what age, shape or size they are, if a drop dead gorgeous model is standing right in front of them, they won’t reach for their jacket to hide their muffin top, they will simply ADMIRE the other woman, her outfit & her shoes without comparing themselves to her. They won’t even ask where she bought her shoes because they know that style is a very individual thing, so those shoes look great on the model, she, however, has a very different style of shoe, SHE likes. The model rocks! & so does she! Remember too, comparing often leads to competing, that’s exhausting & a death knell to friendship. Admiring is always win=win!

A French woman likes her body. Her body is never fat! It’s voluptuously shaped,  curved…rounded. A French woman wears her sensuality well & effortlessly because she knows she doesn’t need to try, the mere fact that she was born a woman & all the deliciousness that comes with that, makes her feel highly desirable.

Bibi’ Macron (the current French president’s wife, her real name is Brigitte, but, really…there can only be one Brigitte. B.B.) is an older woman who is extremely comfortable in her own skin. I don’t hear anyone here, in France, mention the age difference between Monsieur Macron & her lovely self, (at 64, she is 24 years his senior ) Bibi is a woman & that alone makes her beautiful. It’s not about fat, thin, OLD, ugly or pretty! It’s simply about being a woman & everything gorgeously amazing that embodies, femininity, strength & gentleness.brigitte-bardot-396155_960_720

So, NEVER compare yourself to other women. Always ADMIRE.